9September

Hello hi hi hi.

I miss my soldier already :(

This weekend was a blast with him. And how i wish time will not past. I miss cuddling with you already. Although we really spent our weekends well, i wont be able to see u for the next 12 days. Field camp boohoo :( Someone teach me how to not get love sick. I think even 24/7 being with you is not enough. 

But looking at the bright side, my soldier will finish his most difficult part of BMT by the next time i see him. One step more to be a man :) 

While we were in the cab going to pasir ris, many thoughts just flash through my mind. And it was awful. How long is the next time i get to hold his hands and touch his oily face. HAHA. Also something he said killed me a little inside. 

I guess it is pretty normal to feel insecure when he will be in camp for 70% of his time, and what's more 6 days with no contact with outside world except the evil jungle. But all i want is at least a slight pinch of trust. Other girls may be cheap, be a slut. But how long have u known me. Have i ever cheated on you? I keep my distance. I go home early for you. I make it a point to not drink while im out with my friends even if they are. All because i want you to feel more secure, and to not have anything to worry about after you book out. 

That's pretty much the least i can do. I guess i am pretty bad at it. Seeing his frustrated brows when i feel down. Dada, i know you've been through a lot. Im sorry. I will try my best to make your book out carefree. No worries, no nothing. Just smiles, flowers, rainbow , anything that is happy.

I want to do more for you. I want you to feel secure. I don't want you to have all these nonsensical worries or trouble. I love you, and that's all it matters. I really hope you can see it. 

But i am really glad that u brought me out to meet your section mates. It is nice to know where i stand in your heart :)

Dada, if u actually read this before your field camp, JIAYOU!!!! I know you will do your best. I know you will perform. Because you are Wallace. Don't worry, i wont do anything stupid to jeopardize our relationship because what we have is different from the other couples. I am Jiayan, not slutyan. LOL. Will be there on Friday to see u book out silly boy. I love you ♥

PS: I can never get enough of you!